WHAT IS INSIDE ME THAT YEARNS EXPRESSION

​What is inside me that wants to be expressed?
What truth do I contain beyond my bullshit?
What songs do I need to compose?
What poems to write?
What images to make?


Sometimes I've had the experience of:
“I was meant to make this”
“This is a significant piece of work”


I'm always working toward that feeling.
It comes rarely, I won't lie to you.


Right now I'm kind of in a mist.
Things are still yet much is happening.
Have you ever had that feeling?


What do you do when you don't know the way forward?
What have you done?


Or is it simply about deciding where to go
and taking steps toward that place?
Could it be that easy?


Then comes the question:
where do I want to go?
Which is intertwined with:
what is there inside me that yearns to be expressed?


What I've done up until now is okay, I mean,
it is pleasant and in some measure, relevant to me.


Then why the need to change?
Change toward what?
How do you start flying
if you feel you don't have wings?
But you do, you know it.
Deep down, you know it.


There's something inside you,
inside me, inside each of us.
Something special, unique.
Something magnificent.
Sometimes it shines.
And it's beautiful.
I have seen it.
Have you?




It sings the most wondrous melodies,
inspires the most exquisite poems,
flashes the most perfect images.


Fills one's heart with delight.


When we overcome the filters,
and the bullshit, and the momentum
of daily living, forgetting to live
and going with the motions
to ease the toughened strain.


That doesn't happen often.
But when it happens, you know it immediately.
When you see someone on the other side,
you feel good and want to be beside them.
They know something.
They're in touch with that something.
That magnificent something.
They're shining it forth
and they're not even trying.
They just let it,
and it happens!


Haven't you noticed?


We notice so little these days.
Filled with shit, distracted,
why do we let it go on??
It is true we copy the people around us.
There are probably other,
more complex reasons too.


How much of our lives
can we say we have truly
whole-heartedly, deliberately,
unconditionally, fully lived?


Why are our standards so low?


I see so much limitation,
so much conditioning,
so much interference,
so much bullshit!


All of which we both
accept and create,
and which leads us
away from our essence!


And so often we aren't even aware
we posess an essence, a core identity.


We get caught up in the superficial
and never dare look deeper.
And then we say life is about surviving!
Dear me! Where have we gone wrong?
And how do we get back on track?


Is this what was intended?


What is inside me that yearns expression?


If I trust it, will it show me the way?


If I fear, and are led astray from it,
on what ground rests my existence?
Is it truth, or is it illusion?


What is inside me that yearns expression?


Will I let it come out?
Or will I try to hide it?